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aewm:
im horny but like… horny for a successful future full of happiness and satisfaction with the person ive become
(via confirmance)
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THIS. FUCKING READ IT, UNDERSTAND IT, THEN REREAD IT, THEN SHARE IT, THEN NEVER EVER FUCKING EVER USE SLUT AS AN INSULT AGAIN, OK? OK.
(via squidyword)
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3 year old death grip!
omfg
iM LAUGHING SO HARD BC THE BROTHER IS STARING AT HER LIKE “OMFG” AND SHES STANIDNG BACK THERE HOLDING HER HANDS LIKE “i never knew what i was capable of, my powers are here”
I just reblogged this yesterday but I fucking had to do it again because it gets funnier every single time omg
(via teenscoolest)
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no offense I haven’t heard a girl talk at length about pumpkin spice anything in years and I can’t remember the last time I went six hours without hearing a grown man making fun of how obsessed girls are with pumpkin spice lattes
(via alexander)
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National Anthems Summarized
Most national anthems can be boiled down to “Isn’t it great the war’s over?”, “Let’s all stand together” and/or “Our nation is great because God is on our side”. But there are a select few that take a different approach…
“Wilhelmus” (Netherlands): My name is William of Nassau. I’m Dutch and super-religious.
“God Save the Queen” (United Kingdom): Don’t let our Queen down, God.
“Himno Nacional del Perú” (Peru): We’re finally free! Let’s hope it stays that way.
“Hino Nacional Brasileiro” (Brazil): Brazil is fucking rad.
“Der er et Yndigt Land” (Denmark): Denmark is really pretty.
“Himnusz” (Hungary): Hey, God, remember all those times you helped Hungarians? Yeah, keep doing that.
“Hymne Monégasque” (Monaco): Hi! We’re Monaco. Here’s some stuff about us you should know.
“Mexicanos, al Grito de Guerra” (Mexico): Start shit with Mexico, and we will fuck you up.
“Gloria al Bravo Pueblo” (Venezuela): People who shake off oppression are awesome.
“El Gran Carlemany” (Andorra): Charlemagne was cool.
“İstiklâl Marşı” (Turkey): We have a pretty sweet flag.
“The Star-Spangled Banner” (United States): Hey, so I know there’s a war going on over there and all, but would you mind telling me if they’re still flying our flag?
“God Defend New Zealand” (New Zealand): Defend us, God! (Also, isn’t is great how “Zealand” rhymes with “free land”?)
“Mongol Ulsiin Töriin Duulal” (Mongolia): Let’s do our best, everyone!
“My Belarusy” (Belarus): We are very nice people.
“Pincez Tous vos Koras, Frappez les Balafons” (Senegal): Our national anthem is more African than your national anthem.
“Limba Noastră” (Moldova): We are super-excited about our language.
“Zdravlijca” (Slovenia): We just really like drinking.
(via alexander)
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